Monday, April 21, 2003
i've often made us of the cliche that "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger." in fact, last semester it became something of a mantra as i struggled through 470. however, i've realized of late that this expression is really only true in a long-term sense. in retrospect, it seems obvious, yet it came as something of a revelation when i realized that struggles that take an immense toll have a serious weakening effect in the short-term. much like weight lifting actually tears muscles, and its during periods of rest that the actual growth and muscle building occurs, i'm starting to think that it's in the periods of relative ease and recovery that true character development and healing occurs. and that's what makes you stronger.
Friday, March 07, 2003
ok, finally i think i'm ready to share the 2nd Installment about my fun-filled mexico trip.
Saturday, Mar 1
-----------------------------------
8 or 8:30am- i wake up, immediately head out to the beach and lay on a chaise lounge (incidentally, isn't that a great word?) and read while soaking up some rays. it's already getting hot, but there's a stiff breeze off the ocean, making the temperature very pleasant in the sunshine. i wander around for a bit, walk quite a ways down the beach. some kid is like, swimming in the ocean w/ a little boogie board and no adults in the immediate vicinity. i'm like, "hey, kid!" but he doens't pay attention to me. so i'm like, "HEY!" but he just kind of swims away, like maybe he doesn't understand or he's afraid of me or something. but i'm all concerned 'n what-not because this kid is swimming in the OCEAN and he appears to be like 7 years old or something. apparently some maternal instinct that resides deep within me and is seldom expressed has been stirred. i start walking again, but looking around trying to find an adult to associate w/ this child. i finally see this guy starting to walk towards me so i say "hey, is that your kid?" and he's like "MINE-" while pointing to the kid. so i'm relieved, and resume my walk back up the beach.
i find out the harbor is closed, but nobody knows why. i ask if it's because of the high winds, but they tell me it's really not that bad. evidently, there is one guy in charge of the harbor, and when he says it's closed, it's closed. there are no boats in sight, but several windsurfers totally going crazy jumping the waves and stuff. the australian guy at a stand (for renting boats and stuff) tells me that those guys are relatives of the guy in charge of the harbor and that's the only reason they get away w/ being out there. i'm bummed, becasue i wanted to go parasailing or something, but i can't since the harbor's closed.
11am-2pm: i relax in the hammock in the shade and finish reading Lord of the Rings: the 2 Towers. i am getting alot more out of these books the 2nd time around than i did when i read them before in high school or whatever. i have some lunch and generally stay out of the sun because i don't want to get burned. however, despite multiple coats of sunblock and staying in the shade, i still get some sun.
2-5pm: i borrow a bike from the hotel and ride around Playacar for a little bit. there are all these weird houses that i photograph. i ride down a trail that goes through a golf course, and i want to ride down this dirt trail i see but then i realize that i have no idea how the Mexican trespassing laws work and i've heard all kinds of stories about tourists getting thrown into Mexican jail. so i ride back onto the street, then i ride into the town of Playa del Carmen. the streets are dusty and chaotic, filled w/ milling pedestrians from bronzed natives to sunburnt tourists, mopeds, bicycles and an assortment of cars, mostly taxis and small fuel-efficient vehicles. but there are occasional vans. not a lot of SUVs down there. i ride onto 4th avenue and get yelled at because you're not allowed to ride bikes there. but i don't have a lock, so i just walk my bike back to the nearest cross street.
on the way back, i stop at a tiny little convenience store to get some water. i grab a bottle and notice w/ disappointment that despite having been in a fridge, it's not even slightly cold. then i open the bottle and it explodes because it's actually carbonated. so that's pretty disappointing. i drink as much as i can force myself to, then hop back onto the bike and ride back to the hotel feeling rather dusty and tired out, since i have ridden all over town at this point. there are no traffic lights in playa del carmen, just an occasional traffic cop in the middle of the intersection waving his hands and blowing a whistle ineffectually. nevertheless, traffic moves, albeit in somewhat chaotic patterns.
5-8pm: upon returning to the hotel, the guy who takes care of the bikes strikes up a conversation. for some reason i still haven't fully ascertained, he asks me "estudias la biblia?" when i respond in the affirmative, i discover he's also one of Jehovah's Witnesses, or los Testigos de Jehova, as we are known in spanish. so that's kind of crazy. his name is Marcos. we talk for a bit, then agree to meet later so he can show me around town. i had been planning to walk back into town later so that i can see the shops and what-not (and not get busted for riding a bike where i'm not supposed to, etc). I go swimming in the pool, get cleaned up and have dinner.
8-11pm: i meet up w/ Marcos and we walk back into Playa del Carmen. we go to a place where this lady braids just the front part of my hair in corn rows for 10 bucks. i kind of fake out the lady and her husband who work there, since they don't realize at first that i understand everythign that's happening. once the joke is up they start talking to me in spanish. we keep trying to find marcasite earrings for my mom, but nobody has any for anythign resembling a reasonable price. i figure if i can get it cheaper STate-side, why buy it in Mexico? in the end, i only wind up getting a present for tonya, because i see an anklet i think she would really like, and plus i espeically wanted to get something for her and/or Jakes, since they will pick me up at hte airport the next day. so it's the least i can do. we wander all over town and occasionally i pretend not to know spanish.
11pm- finally i'm back at the hotel and my trip is almost over. i try to pack almost everything because i know i have to be up at like 6 the next day. Marcos is despondent at the thoguht of my imminent departure.
Sunday, Mar 2
-----------------------------------
6am- i miraculously wake up. moments later the front desk actually remembers to give me a wake-up call. i stumble into my last remaining outfit that wasn't packed and discover my bathing suits are both still wet because it's so humid down there. even though i brought everything in one carry-on bag, i'm not up to the challenge of somehow cramming it all back in there. so improvise my beach bag as a carry-on and pack everythgin else into my rolling backpack. I wish Marcos well and after checking out (and not getting charged for my phone call to the US, remarkably) I'm off to the airport.
I get searched, oddly enough, but luckily i don't have very much stuff so it only takes a few moments. then i'm waiting around for the plane and really there isnt much to tell. our plane gets to detroit about half hour early, but they wo'nt let us disembark because stupid Metro isn't ready for us w/ customs personnel. so we sit on the plane for EVER and wait. this is so typical of DTW. meanwhile, Ta and Jakes drive in circles because they were there on time and they're waiting to take me home. luckily, i grab my bag instantly off the baggage carousel and proceed through customs quickly.
and that's really that. sorry i got kind of rushed towards the end i just didn't feel like writing about it anymore. some other stuff happened but i think i included all the highlights. the trip was really too short, but it was a good start i think . and i finally have a stamp in my passport now!
=)
Saturday, Mar 1
-----------------------------------
8 or 8:30am- i wake up, immediately head out to the beach and lay on a chaise lounge (incidentally, isn't that a great word?) and read while soaking up some rays. it's already getting hot, but there's a stiff breeze off the ocean, making the temperature very pleasant in the sunshine. i wander around for a bit, walk quite a ways down the beach. some kid is like, swimming in the ocean w/ a little boogie board and no adults in the immediate vicinity. i'm like, "hey, kid!" but he doens't pay attention to me. so i'm like, "HEY!" but he just kind of swims away, like maybe he doesn't understand or he's afraid of me or something. but i'm all concerned 'n what-not because this kid is swimming in the OCEAN and he appears to be like 7 years old or something. apparently some maternal instinct that resides deep within me and is seldom expressed has been stirred. i start walking again, but looking around trying to find an adult to associate w/ this child. i finally see this guy starting to walk towards me so i say "hey, is that your kid?" and he's like "MINE-" while pointing to the kid. so i'm relieved, and resume my walk back up the beach.
i find out the harbor is closed, but nobody knows why. i ask if it's because of the high winds, but they tell me it's really not that bad. evidently, there is one guy in charge of the harbor, and when he says it's closed, it's closed. there are no boats in sight, but several windsurfers totally going crazy jumping the waves and stuff. the australian guy at a stand (for renting boats and stuff) tells me that those guys are relatives of the guy in charge of the harbor and that's the only reason they get away w/ being out there. i'm bummed, becasue i wanted to go parasailing or something, but i can't since the harbor's closed.
11am-2pm: i relax in the hammock in the shade and finish reading Lord of the Rings: the 2 Towers. i am getting alot more out of these books the 2nd time around than i did when i read them before in high school or whatever. i have some lunch and generally stay out of the sun because i don't want to get burned. however, despite multiple coats of sunblock and staying in the shade, i still get some sun.
2-5pm: i borrow a bike from the hotel and ride around Playacar for a little bit. there are all these weird houses that i photograph. i ride down a trail that goes through a golf course, and i want to ride down this dirt trail i see but then i realize that i have no idea how the Mexican trespassing laws work and i've heard all kinds of stories about tourists getting thrown into Mexican jail. so i ride back onto the street, then i ride into the town of Playa del Carmen. the streets are dusty and chaotic, filled w/ milling pedestrians from bronzed natives to sunburnt tourists, mopeds, bicycles and an assortment of cars, mostly taxis and small fuel-efficient vehicles. but there are occasional vans. not a lot of SUVs down there. i ride onto 4th avenue and get yelled at because you're not allowed to ride bikes there. but i don't have a lock, so i just walk my bike back to the nearest cross street.
on the way back, i stop at a tiny little convenience store to get some water. i grab a bottle and notice w/ disappointment that despite having been in a fridge, it's not even slightly cold. then i open the bottle and it explodes because it's actually carbonated. so that's pretty disappointing. i drink as much as i can force myself to, then hop back onto the bike and ride back to the hotel feeling rather dusty and tired out, since i have ridden all over town at this point. there are no traffic lights in playa del carmen, just an occasional traffic cop in the middle of the intersection waving his hands and blowing a whistle ineffectually. nevertheless, traffic moves, albeit in somewhat chaotic patterns.
5-8pm: upon returning to the hotel, the guy who takes care of the bikes strikes up a conversation. for some reason i still haven't fully ascertained, he asks me "estudias la biblia?" when i respond in the affirmative, i discover he's also one of Jehovah's Witnesses, or los Testigos de Jehova, as we are known in spanish. so that's kind of crazy. his name is Marcos. we talk for a bit, then agree to meet later so he can show me around town. i had been planning to walk back into town later so that i can see the shops and what-not (and not get busted for riding a bike where i'm not supposed to, etc). I go swimming in the pool, get cleaned up and have dinner.
8-11pm: i meet up w/ Marcos and we walk back into Playa del Carmen. we go to a place where this lady braids just the front part of my hair in corn rows for 10 bucks. i kind of fake out the lady and her husband who work there, since they don't realize at first that i understand everythign that's happening. once the joke is up they start talking to me in spanish. we keep trying to find marcasite earrings for my mom, but nobody has any for anythign resembling a reasonable price. i figure if i can get it cheaper STate-side, why buy it in Mexico? in the end, i only wind up getting a present for tonya, because i see an anklet i think she would really like, and plus i espeically wanted to get something for her and/or Jakes, since they will pick me up at hte airport the next day. so it's the least i can do. we wander all over town and occasionally i pretend not to know spanish.
11pm- finally i'm back at the hotel and my trip is almost over. i try to pack almost everything because i know i have to be up at like 6 the next day. Marcos is despondent at the thoguht of my imminent departure.
Sunday, Mar 2
-----------------------------------
6am- i miraculously wake up. moments later the front desk actually remembers to give me a wake-up call. i stumble into my last remaining outfit that wasn't packed and discover my bathing suits are both still wet because it's so humid down there. even though i brought everything in one carry-on bag, i'm not up to the challenge of somehow cramming it all back in there. so improvise my beach bag as a carry-on and pack everythgin else into my rolling backpack. I wish Marcos well and after checking out (and not getting charged for my phone call to the US, remarkably) I'm off to the airport.
I get searched, oddly enough, but luckily i don't have very much stuff so it only takes a few moments. then i'm waiting around for the plane and really there isnt much to tell. our plane gets to detroit about half hour early, but they wo'nt let us disembark because stupid Metro isn't ready for us w/ customs personnel. so we sit on the plane for EVER and wait. this is so typical of DTW. meanwhile, Ta and Jakes drive in circles because they were there on time and they're waiting to take me home. luckily, i grab my bag instantly off the baggage carousel and proceed through customs quickly.
and that's really that. sorry i got kind of rushed towards the end i just didn't feel like writing about it anymore. some other stuff happened but i think i included all the highlights. the trip was really too short, but it was a good start i think . and i finally have a stamp in my passport now!
=)
Tuesday, March 04, 2003
hello all. well, i'm back from mexico and ready to cause trouble again. in case anyone is interested in my trip, i figured i'd publish a run-down here. a page will be available soon and i'll post a link. in the meantime, small versions of my pictures are available here:
http://photos.yahoo.com/spoongrrl19
so here's basically what happened:
Thursday, Feb 27
-------------------------
7:45 am- got to the pathetic excuse for an airport known as Detroit Metro Wayne County. everybody was there at like 9:30, so they said they'd let our 10:25 flight leave early. however, since it's DTW, we sat on the runway forever waiting for a de-icing machine. so the plane didn't take off until closer to 11.
2 pm or so (local time)- arrived at Cancun. proceeded outside swiftly, since i brought everything in my carry-on. waited for a while on the sidewalk until my transportation finally arrived. rode to the hotel in Playa del Carmen. apparently the driver had only driven before once or twice. i was sitting up front so i saw everything. it was scary, but i survived. i actually tipped the guy out of gratitude i was still alive.
3-5 pm- frantically running around trying to make a phone call home to tell my parents i got there all right. was irritated because my cell phone got 3 bars of signal but i still coudln't call anybody w/ it. whenever i tried i got this wack message. i think the lady was saying something about an invalid number, but i have trouble understanding spanish over the phone. i couldn't get my dumb phone card to work, either. some dude at this store at the plaza down the street from the hotel was all "No hablo ingles" then he was really surprised when i said "esta bien. Necesito usar un telefono, pero los telefonos alli no me permite usar mi tarjeta..." it was kinda funny. finally i ended up using the hotel phone to call my aunt's house (my parents' was busy). the receptionist told me it would cost me 10 bucks, but they never charged me. [NOTE- later i find out that my cellphone didn't work because i didn't have international dialing ACTIVATED, a small matter that the verizon representatives i spoke w/ just a day earlier to ask about the cost of using my phone in Mexico FORGOT TO MENTION)
5-11 pm- later i spent some time w/ this lady who represented my tour company, Apple. after much waiting and such, she managed to book me a tour for the next day. i went swimming in the pool and explored the hotel a bit. had dinner, which was delicious, around 9. lounged in the hammock a bit (all the rooms have hammocks outside on the porch, which is AWESOME as far as i'm concerned). went inside to discover hte bathroom had been taken over by a small colony of ANTS. killed as many as i could, but they all ran away when i turned on the light. the A/C made a noise and generated a gentle, warm breeze. i tried to go to sleep since i had to be ready to leave at 7am.
Friday, Feb 28
---------------------
6:10am- miraculously i wake up, despite the fact that i didn't hear my alarm going off on the other side of the room. i was afraid my cell phone's lousy battery would die (it often does) so i plugged it into the charger using the only outlet, which was across the room. apparently in an effort to make my vacation feel more like a vacation, the hotel does not have any clocks. period. shake my head w/ relief that i still woke up. i get ready and wait for the tour van to arrive, which is 25 minutes late or something. but i didn't know it would be late, so i didn't go upstairs and get breakfast.
7:30am- riding in the van, the guide, Salvador, is amazed that an American can speak even rudimentary Spanish. our chatting apparently distracts him and he forgets to pick up one couple who is coming on our tour. we have to go back to Playacar to pick them up. nobody minds, since we're on vacation. after a brief pit stop, Salvador shares gives us each a weird but tasty cookie. this is the only food i will have for the next 5 hours.
11am or something- arrive at the Mayan village of Pac-Chen after driving down roads that put even Michigan potholes to shame. I'm glad i was riding in the front, since i probably would have been sick otherwise, not having had any real food all day. Once we get to the Mayan village, we hike around for a bit then canoe in a beautiful lake. salvador reminds the tourists that paddling on one side makes you go the other way (based on my own observations, this counsel was needed by at least a few of them). Salvador and I share a canoe, since i'm the only one there who's not part of a couple. we're the only ones w/ no lifejackets, and the only ones who actually jump in the water for a bit. (maybe the others were scared of the caymans?)
then we hike around the lake, and get to this rip cord thing. it's maybe 40 or 50 feet high cliff, w/ water below. i'm not good w/ distances so maybe i'm off. the rip chord is really fun, not scary though. none of it was. it was all just fun. the other people act like they're scared to go, but i don't know if they really are or not.
after that, we continue to hike to this other part of the village, where we rapel down into a cenote, which is a big cavern filled w/ water. the one we go into is called Jaguar cenote. it's about 50 feet down to get to the water, and the water is hundreds of feet deep, but perfectly clear. tree roots hang down from the roof above into the water. the sunlight shines down in beams from the few holes overhead, casting eery pools of light into the water and transforming anyone who briefly swims into the beam into an angel bathed in gold. i get cold after swimming around a bit, and venture to climb up the long rope ladder to get out. it's crazy and not for the faint of heart, or weak of limb. my arms are shaking slightly by the time i finally reach the top.
2pm or so- we finally hike back to the village proper (if you can call it that) and eat LUNCH! by this time, my body has forgotten how to metabolize food. a newly married couple from pennsylvania and i discover a new form of refreshment- sprite mixed w/ grape juice (it was yummy).
3pm- we pile back into the van and drive about 45 mins to Coba, one of the largest and least-developed Mayan archaelogical sites. since the yucatan is flat, anytime you see a hill, you know it's man-made. there are many unexcavated mayan structures all over the place. at Coba, which is a national park, Salvador leaves us w/ a guide who unenthusiastically tells us some stuff about hte ruins. then I rent a bike to ride the kilometer or so to the biggest pyramid, an ancient temple that stands some 40 meters tall. i am the first one of the group to get there, since i was flying on my rented (for 20 pesos) bike. without hesitation i begin to climb and reach the top a few moments later, slightly breathless. Salvador is waiting at the top.
the view is amazing- it looks way higher when you're actually up there than it did from below. the treeline is far beneath and we can see the lake we passed earlier on the way, glimmering in the slanting orange rays of the sun as it slides toward the horizon before us. there is a little room at hte top that you can enter. unfortunately, a sign forbids climbing onto the top of hte roof (i'm thinking- hey i've come this far... but evidently those Mexicans read my mind before i even got there). eventually all but one of our companions climbs up and we hang out for a while until this park ranger dude makes us leave (which is a bummer since we wanted to watch teh sunset up there). although Salvador and I are the last to start making our way down, we're among the first to reach the bottom.
6pm- we get ready to leave coba. i take a picture of this WACK huge ATV that has been converted into an RV. the folks who own it don't mind my camera. the others in our group drink Coronas. we take the long drive back to Playa del Carmen, and this time Salvador actually openly blames me when we almost forget to drop off one of the couples near the exit for Xcaret. we're talking in spanish and the other passengers don't seem to notice when we turn around and backtrack about a half mile or so. in the end it only takes an extra 5 or 10 mins. i get to the hotel and promise to email Salvador the picture of hte crazy ATV thing. i swim in the pool, clean up and have dinner. i write some postcards and have a drink, then lounge in the hammock again before bed. the stupid lamp in the hotel room shocks me when i touch it w/ barefeet. it freaks me out at first, then just makes me angry. i discover that the ants are back- evidently they only come out at night.
----------------------------------------------------
check back later for hte Next Installment.
(this is taking just TOO, TOO LONG to write up!!)
http://photos.yahoo.com/spoongrrl19
so here's basically what happened:
Thursday, Feb 27
-------------------------
7:45 am- got to the pathetic excuse for an airport known as Detroit Metro Wayne County. everybody was there at like 9:30, so they said they'd let our 10:25 flight leave early. however, since it's DTW, we sat on the runway forever waiting for a de-icing machine. so the plane didn't take off until closer to 11.
2 pm or so (local time)- arrived at Cancun. proceeded outside swiftly, since i brought everything in my carry-on. waited for a while on the sidewalk until my transportation finally arrived. rode to the hotel in Playa del Carmen. apparently the driver had only driven before once or twice. i was sitting up front so i saw everything. it was scary, but i survived. i actually tipped the guy out of gratitude i was still alive.
3-5 pm- frantically running around trying to make a phone call home to tell my parents i got there all right. was irritated because my cell phone got 3 bars of signal but i still coudln't call anybody w/ it. whenever i tried i got this wack message. i think the lady was saying something about an invalid number, but i have trouble understanding spanish over the phone. i couldn't get my dumb phone card to work, either. some dude at this store at the plaza down the street from the hotel was all "No hablo ingles" then he was really surprised when i said "esta bien. Necesito usar un telefono, pero los telefonos alli no me permite usar mi tarjeta..." it was kinda funny. finally i ended up using the hotel phone to call my aunt's house (my parents' was busy). the receptionist told me it would cost me 10 bucks, but they never charged me. [NOTE- later i find out that my cellphone didn't work because i didn't have international dialing ACTIVATED, a small matter that the verizon representatives i spoke w/ just a day earlier to ask about the cost of using my phone in Mexico FORGOT TO MENTION)
5-11 pm- later i spent some time w/ this lady who represented my tour company, Apple. after much waiting and such, she managed to book me a tour for the next day. i went swimming in the pool and explored the hotel a bit. had dinner, which was delicious, around 9. lounged in the hammock a bit (all the rooms have hammocks outside on the porch, which is AWESOME as far as i'm concerned). went inside to discover hte bathroom had been taken over by a small colony of ANTS. killed as many as i could, but they all ran away when i turned on the light. the A/C made a noise and generated a gentle, warm breeze. i tried to go to sleep since i had to be ready to leave at 7am.
Friday, Feb 28
---------------------
6:10am- miraculously i wake up, despite the fact that i didn't hear my alarm going off on the other side of the room. i was afraid my cell phone's lousy battery would die (it often does) so i plugged it into the charger using the only outlet, which was across the room. apparently in an effort to make my vacation feel more like a vacation, the hotel does not have any clocks. period. shake my head w/ relief that i still woke up. i get ready and wait for the tour van to arrive, which is 25 minutes late or something. but i didn't know it would be late, so i didn't go upstairs and get breakfast.
7:30am- riding in the van, the guide, Salvador, is amazed that an American can speak even rudimentary Spanish. our chatting apparently distracts him and he forgets to pick up one couple who is coming on our tour. we have to go back to Playacar to pick them up. nobody minds, since we're on vacation. after a brief pit stop, Salvador shares gives us each a weird but tasty cookie. this is the only food i will have for the next 5 hours.
11am or something- arrive at the Mayan village of Pac-Chen after driving down roads that put even Michigan potholes to shame. I'm glad i was riding in the front, since i probably would have been sick otherwise, not having had any real food all day. Once we get to the Mayan village, we hike around for a bit then canoe in a beautiful lake. salvador reminds the tourists that paddling on one side makes you go the other way (based on my own observations, this counsel was needed by at least a few of them). Salvador and I share a canoe, since i'm the only one there who's not part of a couple. we're the only ones w/ no lifejackets, and the only ones who actually jump in the water for a bit. (maybe the others were scared of the caymans?)
then we hike around the lake, and get to this rip cord thing. it's maybe 40 or 50 feet high cliff, w/ water below. i'm not good w/ distances so maybe i'm off. the rip chord is really fun, not scary though. none of it was. it was all just fun. the other people act like they're scared to go, but i don't know if they really are or not.
after that, we continue to hike to this other part of the village, where we rapel down into a cenote, which is a big cavern filled w/ water. the one we go into is called Jaguar cenote. it's about 50 feet down to get to the water, and the water is hundreds of feet deep, but perfectly clear. tree roots hang down from the roof above into the water. the sunlight shines down in beams from the few holes overhead, casting eery pools of light into the water and transforming anyone who briefly swims into the beam into an angel bathed in gold. i get cold after swimming around a bit, and venture to climb up the long rope ladder to get out. it's crazy and not for the faint of heart, or weak of limb. my arms are shaking slightly by the time i finally reach the top.
2pm or so- we finally hike back to the village proper (if you can call it that) and eat LUNCH! by this time, my body has forgotten how to metabolize food. a newly married couple from pennsylvania and i discover a new form of refreshment- sprite mixed w/ grape juice (it was yummy).
3pm- we pile back into the van and drive about 45 mins to Coba, one of the largest and least-developed Mayan archaelogical sites. since the yucatan is flat, anytime you see a hill, you know it's man-made. there are many unexcavated mayan structures all over the place. at Coba, which is a national park, Salvador leaves us w/ a guide who unenthusiastically tells us some stuff about hte ruins. then I rent a bike to ride the kilometer or so to the biggest pyramid, an ancient temple that stands some 40 meters tall. i am the first one of the group to get there, since i was flying on my rented (for 20 pesos) bike. without hesitation i begin to climb and reach the top a few moments later, slightly breathless. Salvador is waiting at the top.
the view is amazing- it looks way higher when you're actually up there than it did from below. the treeline is far beneath and we can see the lake we passed earlier on the way, glimmering in the slanting orange rays of the sun as it slides toward the horizon before us. there is a little room at hte top that you can enter. unfortunately, a sign forbids climbing onto the top of hte roof (i'm thinking- hey i've come this far... but evidently those Mexicans read my mind before i even got there). eventually all but one of our companions climbs up and we hang out for a while until this park ranger dude makes us leave (which is a bummer since we wanted to watch teh sunset up there). although Salvador and I are the last to start making our way down, we're among the first to reach the bottom.
6pm- we get ready to leave coba. i take a picture of this WACK huge ATV that has been converted into an RV. the folks who own it don't mind my camera. the others in our group drink Coronas. we take the long drive back to Playa del Carmen, and this time Salvador actually openly blames me when we almost forget to drop off one of the couples near the exit for Xcaret. we're talking in spanish and the other passengers don't seem to notice when we turn around and backtrack about a half mile or so. in the end it only takes an extra 5 or 10 mins. i get to the hotel and promise to email Salvador the picture of hte crazy ATV thing. i swim in the pool, clean up and have dinner. i write some postcards and have a drink, then lounge in the hammock again before bed. the stupid lamp in the hotel room shocks me when i touch it w/ barefeet. it freaks me out at first, then just makes me angry. i discover that the ants are back- evidently they only come out at night.
----------------------------------------------------
check back later for hte Next Installment.
(this is taking just TOO, TOO LONG to write up!!)
Thursday, February 20, 2003
hello. i just wanted to share this poem i made w/ magnetic poetry online. so here it is:
hopefully this will work.
hopefully this will work.
Sunday, February 09, 2003
i just realized this afternoon that i am psychic. i have the remarkable ability to read minds. unfortunately, i am only able to exercise this power over very short distances, and only while i'm asleep.
right now it doens't take a psychic to realize what you're probably thinking. you're thinking "this is silly- this girl cannot read minds while she's asleep." well, let me provide some evidence for the truth of this claim. i have only 2 examples to provide when DID in fact read someone's mind while sleeping, but i think if i slep near other people more often and if i remembered my dreams more often, i would probably have a lot more proof to back up my claim.
Case 1: some months ago, i was over at my aunt's house in Grand Rapids for the weekend. i was sleeping alone in Jessica's room, while she was sleeping out on the couch in the family room (i didn't ask her to give up her bed, but she felt like it for some reason). anyways, she has an orange cat that is really friendly and sweet. earlier that night, i was playing with the cat for like an hour or something. during that time, i undoubtedly formed a strong rapport with the cat. the next morning, i was lying in bed sleeping, but i was in the light stage of sleep when you're going to wake up pretty soon. i was having this dream about somebody being stuck behind a door. i couldn't see who it was, but i could hear a voice saying "i'm stuck behind this door- somebody help me- i need to get out through this door- help me get through this door..." over and over again. gradually as i awoke, the sound of the voice in the dream blended with the actual sound i was hearing in real life- the cat was meowing loudly from out in the hallway. i got up, and opening the door to Jessica's room, i saw out in teh foyer that the orange cat was in front of the sliding glass door, looking out longingly and putting his paws up on the glass.
i think it's pretty obvious what happened. i clearly must have read the cat's mind while sleeping. so NOT only do i have the ability to read minds, but i have the ability to interpret the thoughts of an entirely different species. pretty cool, huh?
I had all but forgotten this entire episode until i had an eerily similar experience earlier this afternoon. Which brings me to,
Case 2: Earlier today i was lying on my bed napping in the afternoon sunshine. I had awoken at one point, still felt drowsy and slipped back into that nether-state somewhere between sleeping and waking where it's difficult to tell if i'm dreaming or not. it's like i'm just awake enough to realize i might be dreaming. at one point as i was laying there, i thought i heard someone open my door (my door has a bell hanging on the knob for just this purpose- i don't particularly like to have people sneak up on me) gently. i thought i heard my mom whisper softly "Laura, are you awake?" and i thought "Um... I don't think so..." naturally, i didn't respond in any way; not so much as a flutter of an eyelid. When i'm in this state of half-sleep, i can sometimes hear things that are going on around me, but i'm completely unable to respond. in fact, it's a little creepy, because i might think of moving in a particular way, or i might even think i have moved, but in actuality i'm just laying there completely still. i can't even open my eyes. it's a little bit freaky, and i suspect the problem lies in my inability to tell with certainty whehter i'm awake or asleep.
anyways, later after i had awakened, i asked my mom if she came to my room and asked me if i was awake. she said that she had in fact come and opened my door, but she looked to see if i was awake without saying anything. it appears unmistakable that i must have read her mind. after all, what clear thought WOULD she be thinking at that point, other than "are you awake?" she just didn't vocalize the thought. in my sleep, i KNEW she was there, and i KNEW what she was thinking.I
i feel i've presented some compelling evidence of my own heretofore unknown psychic abilities. if i could somehow harness these powers and use them WHILE AWAKE, the results could be impressive indeed. in any case, the situtation merits furhter investigation. indubitably, there is but one way for me to explore my theories further. i have to SLEEP ALL THE TIME. the more i sleep, the more opportunities will arise for me to exercise my telepathic ability. in fact, this proposition sounds so attractive i think i might start right now.
right now it doens't take a psychic to realize what you're probably thinking. you're thinking "this is silly- this girl cannot read minds while she's asleep." well, let me provide some evidence for the truth of this claim. i have only 2 examples to provide when DID in fact read someone's mind while sleeping, but i think if i slep near other people more often and if i remembered my dreams more often, i would probably have a lot more proof to back up my claim.
Case 1: some months ago, i was over at my aunt's house in Grand Rapids for the weekend. i was sleeping alone in Jessica's room, while she was sleeping out on the couch in the family room (i didn't ask her to give up her bed, but she felt like it for some reason). anyways, she has an orange cat that is really friendly and sweet. earlier that night, i was playing with the cat for like an hour or something. during that time, i undoubtedly formed a strong rapport with the cat. the next morning, i was lying in bed sleeping, but i was in the light stage of sleep when you're going to wake up pretty soon. i was having this dream about somebody being stuck behind a door. i couldn't see who it was, but i could hear a voice saying "i'm stuck behind this door- somebody help me- i need to get out through this door- help me get through this door..." over and over again. gradually as i awoke, the sound of the voice in the dream blended with the actual sound i was hearing in real life- the cat was meowing loudly from out in the hallway. i got up, and opening the door to Jessica's room, i saw out in teh foyer that the orange cat was in front of the sliding glass door, looking out longingly and putting his paws up on the glass.
i think it's pretty obvious what happened. i clearly must have read the cat's mind while sleeping. so NOT only do i have the ability to read minds, but i have the ability to interpret the thoughts of an entirely different species. pretty cool, huh?
I had all but forgotten this entire episode until i had an eerily similar experience earlier this afternoon. Which brings me to,
Case 2: Earlier today i was lying on my bed napping in the afternoon sunshine. I had awoken at one point, still felt drowsy and slipped back into that nether-state somewhere between sleeping and waking where it's difficult to tell if i'm dreaming or not. it's like i'm just awake enough to realize i might be dreaming. at one point as i was laying there, i thought i heard someone open my door (my door has a bell hanging on the knob for just this purpose- i don't particularly like to have people sneak up on me) gently. i thought i heard my mom whisper softly "Laura, are you awake?" and i thought "Um... I don't think so..." naturally, i didn't respond in any way; not so much as a flutter of an eyelid. When i'm in this state of half-sleep, i can sometimes hear things that are going on around me, but i'm completely unable to respond. in fact, it's a little creepy, because i might think of moving in a particular way, or i might even think i have moved, but in actuality i'm just laying there completely still. i can't even open my eyes. it's a little bit freaky, and i suspect the problem lies in my inability to tell with certainty whehter i'm awake or asleep.
anyways, later after i had awakened, i asked my mom if she came to my room and asked me if i was awake. she said that she had in fact come and opened my door, but she looked to see if i was awake without saying anything. it appears unmistakable that i must have read her mind. after all, what clear thought WOULD she be thinking at that point, other than "are you awake?" she just didn't vocalize the thought. in my sleep, i KNEW she was there, and i KNEW what she was thinking.I
i feel i've presented some compelling evidence of my own heretofore unknown psychic abilities. if i could somehow harness these powers and use them WHILE AWAKE, the results could be impressive indeed. in any case, the situtation merits furhter investigation. indubitably, there is but one way for me to explore my theories further. i have to SLEEP ALL THE TIME. the more i sleep, the more opportunities will arise for me to exercise my telepathic ability. in fact, this proposition sounds so attractive i think i might start right now.
Saturday, February 08, 2003
my mom just suggested i have a "hair consultation" before lis's wedding. i told her i am not a model, so why should i look like one? for some reason i can't quite pinpoint, this issue kind of ticks me off. why is everyone so uptight about my hair? it makes me want to dye it green or something. that way maybe they'll realize they should have been happy w/ my hair the way it was.
maybe it's because i've been feeling sick and tired all morning, but for some reason this just bugs me. seriously, what is the big deal about my hair? why doesn't everbody just back off? my brother has had the same haircut since 6th grade but i don't go around picking on him about it. i tell him at times when i like the way his hair looks better than others, but i don't say anything on days when i do'nt like the way it looks. why? because
Evidently, no one else shares my hair sensitivities. people are constantly harping on my hair. for god's sake, it's MY HAIR! what do they care? now, since lis is getting married, and i'm going to be in a lot of her pictures, i don't mind if she has some say in how i do my hair for the wedding. ya know 'cuase SHE's the one who's gonna be lookin at these pictures for a long time. but on a general, day to day basis, i have to deal with consistent hair criticism.
you know, i see people who's hair i don't like all the time. IF i bother to notice that i don't like someone's hair, it's just an observation that i file away, and then forget about. because it's NOT MY PROBLEM. and i have no business going around critiquing another person's hair choices. maybe i don't like my mom's hair, enh? do i go around putting her down for it in front of other people? no.
i'm seriously overreacting at this point, which is lending a great sense of comedy to the situtation for me. sometimes being melodramatic adds spice to life. after all, if you aren't passionate about little things, what are the odds that you'll be passionate about something big and important?
that's all i have to say at this time.
maybe it's because i've been feeling sick and tired all morning, but for some reason this just bugs me. seriously, what is the big deal about my hair? why doesn't everbody just back off? my brother has had the same haircut since 6th grade but i don't go around picking on him about it. i tell him at times when i like the way his hair looks better than others, but i don't say anything on days when i do'nt like the way it looks. why? because
- 1. it's none of my business, really. it's HIS hair.
- 2. it might be construed as hurtful or rude to criticize anohter person's hair
- 3. i don't really care that much what his hair looks like.
Evidently, no one else shares my hair sensitivities. people are constantly harping on my hair. for god's sake, it's MY HAIR! what do they care? now, since lis is getting married, and i'm going to be in a lot of her pictures, i don't mind if she has some say in how i do my hair for the wedding. ya know 'cuase SHE's the one who's gonna be lookin at these pictures for a long time. but on a general, day to day basis, i have to deal with consistent hair criticism.
you know, i see people who's hair i don't like all the time. IF i bother to notice that i don't like someone's hair, it's just an observation that i file away, and then forget about. because it's NOT MY PROBLEM. and i have no business going around critiquing another person's hair choices. maybe i don't like my mom's hair, enh? do i go around putting her down for it in front of other people? no.
i'm seriously overreacting at this point, which is lending a great sense of comedy to the situtation for me. sometimes being melodramatic adds spice to life. after all, if you aren't passionate about little things, what are the odds that you'll be passionate about something big and important?
that's all i have to say at this time.
Friday, January 31, 2003
Thursday, January 30, 2003
tonight as i was finally coming home after an excrutiatingly long night in the 373 lab, i felt a need to drive around a bit, which is what i typically do when something is bothering me or whatever. so i finally came to a field that seemed like a good place to stop and look at the stars. sometimes i have a sort of epiphany as i gaze up at the sparkling stars, spread like fine gauze on the inky blackness of the night sky. however, as i stood there gazing in wondering appreciation, only one realization came to me with undisguised, brazen clarity- it was freakin' cold.
and i realized, whatever will be will be, and all i can do is try to live my life the best way i know how. i think i shall have to continue this entry in my *real* journal.
and i realized, whatever will be will be, and all i can do is try to live my life the best way i know how. i think i shall have to continue this entry in my *real* journal.
Wednesday, January 29, 2003
ok, i just a brief thought to mention. whenever i log out of hotmail, it goes to msn.com. it so happens today that one of their articles is entitled "Time Management Quiz- Are you Wasting the Day?." I found this ironic, for reasons that likely appear obvious. I was tempted to take the quiz, but there really wouldn't be much point, would there? -since i already know that Yes, i AM wasting the day...
hmm... rather paradoxical, isn't it?
hmm... rather paradoxical, isn't it?
Tuesday, January 28, 2003
as i'm starting this post, it's my favorite time of day, 11:11. it happens to be PM in this case... oh wait... it's not 11:11 anymore. unfortunately.
well, so on to the point... i feel like sharing some of the music i've been listening to lately. in particular, i'd like to mention a few highlights from the album King by Belly. There is this one song, track 2, which is called "Seal My Fate" and it's an awesome song. pretty soon i expect i finally get around to figuring out how to play it. i'd like to do an acoustic cover of it. the song can also be found on Sweet Ride | The Best of Belly. it's kind of ironic they even have a best-of, since they only had 2 albums. The other song off the album King that i'm really into is track 6... i think it's called "The Bees." for whatever reason, it just seems to fit right now.
Not long ago I was constantly listening to Yankee Hotel Foxtrot by Wilco. Some of my favorites off that one (although the whole album is pretty sweet) include track 9, "Pot Kettle Black," track 8, "I'm the Man Who Loves You" and 6, "Ashes of American Flags". seriously though i enjoy the whole thing. it's a quality album. i can't believe i was never into Wilco before. i'm definitely going to check out some of their earlier stuff. evidently, there;s a movie called "I am Trying to break your heart" (which is the title of the first track) that documents the group making the album and apparently running into all kinds of "Behind the Music"-esque personality conflicts and "artistic differences" and what-not. i think it's a movie you can only see in art theaters or something. i'd like to see it; maybe it will come out on dvd or something.
hmm... what else have i been listening to...? the song "Angels" by Tea Party off their latest (to my knowledge) Interzone Mantras. for a while i was listening to Jack Johnson a lot; that's a really good album, too. i was very pleasantly surprised w/ the quality of guitar work on that album.
of course, other cds that have recently made forays into my player include The Spin by 24 Gone, Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots by Flaming Lips (I saw them in concert and they were lackluster, unfortunately) (incidentally, i have this fully developed video concept for the song "Ego-tripping at the Gates of Hell" track 6... maybe i should try to sell it to the band... everytime i hear the song i see the entire picture in my head), Simple Things by Zero 7 (sweeeeeet album for relaxing, using as background music for a party, driving or just chilling out), the Let Me Teach You How to Rock by world-famous guitarist James Mickens (don't tell me you haven't heard of him), and more recently Is This It by the Strokes, which is actually not an overrated band. they really are pretty good. i have my doubts about their longevity, but taht's no reason not to enjoy it while it lasts. I also have been occasionally listening to Delerium's Semantic Spaces and i had a revelation- the singer who does the angelic female vocals for Delerium is Kristy Thirsk, the singer from the (sadly) now-defunct band Rose Chronicles. I thought that was kinda cool, and it also led me to the realization that Delerium is from Canada, a fact which heretofore had escaped my notice.
well, in case anyone is actually reading this and is sick to death of me blathering on about what music i'm listening to, i'll take a break. 'til next time.
well, so on to the point... i feel like sharing some of the music i've been listening to lately. in particular, i'd like to mention a few highlights from the album King by Belly. There is this one song, track 2, which is called "Seal My Fate" and it's an awesome song. pretty soon i expect i finally get around to figuring out how to play it. i'd like to do an acoustic cover of it. the song can also be found on Sweet Ride | The Best of Belly. it's kind of ironic they even have a best-of, since they only had 2 albums. The other song off the album King that i'm really into is track 6... i think it's called "The Bees." for whatever reason, it just seems to fit right now.
Not long ago I was constantly listening to Yankee Hotel Foxtrot by Wilco. Some of my favorites off that one (although the whole album is pretty sweet) include track 9, "Pot Kettle Black," track 8, "I'm the Man Who Loves You" and 6, "Ashes of American Flags". seriously though i enjoy the whole thing. it's a quality album. i can't believe i was never into Wilco before. i'm definitely going to check out some of their earlier stuff. evidently, there;s a movie called "I am Trying to break your heart" (which is the title of the first track) that documents the group making the album and apparently running into all kinds of "Behind the Music"-esque personality conflicts and "artistic differences" and what-not. i think it's a movie you can only see in art theaters or something. i'd like to see it; maybe it will come out on dvd or something.
hmm... what else have i been listening to...? the song "Angels" by Tea Party off their latest (to my knowledge) Interzone Mantras. for a while i was listening to Jack Johnson a lot; that's a really good album, too. i was very pleasantly surprised w/ the quality of guitar work on that album.
of course, other cds that have recently made forays into my player include The Spin by 24 Gone, Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots by Flaming Lips (I saw them in concert and they were lackluster, unfortunately) (incidentally, i have this fully developed video concept for the song "Ego-tripping at the Gates of Hell" track 6... maybe i should try to sell it to the band... everytime i hear the song i see the entire picture in my head), Simple Things by Zero 7 (sweeeeeet album for relaxing, using as background music for a party, driving or just chilling out), the Let Me Teach You How to Rock by world-famous guitarist James Mickens (don't tell me you haven't heard of him), and more recently Is This It by the Strokes, which is actually not an overrated band. they really are pretty good. i have my doubts about their longevity, but taht's no reason not to enjoy it while it lasts. I also have been occasionally listening to Delerium's Semantic Spaces and i had a revelation- the singer who does the angelic female vocals for Delerium is Kristy Thirsk, the singer from the (sadly) now-defunct band Rose Chronicles. I thought that was kinda cool, and it also led me to the realization that Delerium is from Canada, a fact which heretofore had escaped my notice.
well, in case anyone is actually reading this and is sick to death of me blathering on about what music i'm listening to, i'll take a break. 'til next time.
Monday, January 27, 2003
this morning an unbelievable thing happened. the FedEx lady actually rang the bell!!! Now i know that to some people, this wouldn't seem like such a momentous occasion. However, considering my past history w/ FedEx people, i think this deserves to be memorialized in some outstanding way.
Typically, when the FedEx people come to my house, they are stealthy to the degree that it would be well-nigh impossible to detect one had been there without the tell-tale note left at the door, explaining (and you can imagine this being said with a chuckle) "Sorry we missed you" and a fictitious time stamp describing when they supposedly came. "Sorry they missed us?" i'm sorry we missed them! clearly, it's easy to miss someone who utilizes such advanced evasive techniques as the FedEx people have been known to undertake.
First off, the time named on the note is clearly feigned. i highly suspect the FedEx people actually are in the habit of coming in the middle of the night, when everyone's sleeping soundly and not likely to suddenly wake up wondering, "Could a FedEx person be at the door?" That brings me to my next point- the only way you would ever know the FedEx person was there would have to be from some psychic premonition, since they typically give no sign of their presence. I have formulated a design which I suspect closely resembles their modus operandi-
Needless to say, when the FedEx woman actually drove the truck onto the driveway (I heard it) and RANG THE DOORBELL loud and clear, i almost didn't know how to react. i was virtually beside myself. i raced to the door (despite being clad only in pajamas) (yeah, i slept in this morning.. give me a break i was tired), fearful that by the time i got there, the FedEx truck would be pulling away from the drive, the sarcastically friendly "Sorry we missed you" note tacked to the door with eloquent nonchalance, and i would be left longing forlornly for a day when i wouldn't have to drive though blizzard conditions to the stinking FedEx depot in Saline to pick up the computer parts that i've been waiting at least a week for, only to find that the "Sorry we missed you" note had lied about FedEx's business hours, and actually the office had been closed for over an hour, yearning for the day when a FedEx person would bring the package right to my house....
Well, needless to say, i continue to use FedEx despite this dubious track record. i really hope they're turning over a new leaf. Especially since i'm still expecting a floppy drive to come in the next coupla days...
Typically, when the FedEx people come to my house, they are stealthy to the degree that it would be well-nigh impossible to detect one had been there without the tell-tale note left at the door, explaining (and you can imagine this being said with a chuckle) "Sorry we missed you" and a fictitious time stamp describing when they supposedly came. "Sorry they missed us?" i'm sorry we missed them! clearly, it's easy to miss someone who utilizes such advanced evasive techniques as the FedEx people have been known to undertake.
First off, the time named on the note is clearly feigned. i highly suspect the FedEx people actually are in the habit of coming in the middle of the night, when everyone's sleeping soundly and not likely to suddenly wake up wondering, "Could a FedEx person be at the door?" That brings me to my next point- the only way you would ever know the FedEx person was there would have to be from some psychic premonition, since they typically give no sign of their presence. I have formulated a design which I suspect closely resembles their modus operandi-
- 1.drive slowly past the house in a non-FedEx vehicle, looking for signs of life. if anyone appears to be home, come back later.
- 2.if the house appears unoccuppied, or the occupants are probably sleeping, then return in the FedEx truck, but park the truck several blocks away from the destination, so that it is unlikely to be seen or heard by any possible inhabitants.
- 3.while still in the truck, carefully fill out the "Sorry we missed you" form.
- 4.approach the house warily on foot, taking all possible measures to avoid being seen.
- 5.gingerly tiptoe onto the front porch and delicately affix the form to the door with tape. Furtively sneak off toward the truck.
- 6.upon reaching the truck, chortle gleefully at the thought of having successfully avoided delivery of YET ANOTHER package
Needless to say, when the FedEx woman actually drove the truck onto the driveway (I heard it) and RANG THE DOORBELL loud and clear, i almost didn't know how to react. i was virtually beside myself. i raced to the door (despite being clad only in pajamas) (yeah, i slept in this morning.. give me a break i was tired), fearful that by the time i got there, the FedEx truck would be pulling away from the drive, the sarcastically friendly "Sorry we missed you" note tacked to the door with eloquent nonchalance, and i would be left longing forlornly for a day when i wouldn't have to drive though blizzard conditions to the stinking FedEx depot in Saline to pick up the computer parts that i've been waiting at least a week for, only to find that the "Sorry we missed you" note had lied about FedEx's business hours, and actually the office had been closed for over an hour, yearning for the day when a FedEx person would bring the package right to my house....
Well, needless to say, i continue to use FedEx despite this dubious track record. i really hope they're turning over a new leaf. Especially since i'm still expecting a floppy drive to come in the next coupla days...
Saturday, January 25, 2003
well i played at open mic night at pierpont commons last night. it was fun, although everybody else was so good it was a little bit intimidating. i wish i had a band. i don't like playing alone very much. on the bright side though, i actually played surprisingly well considering i hadn't picked up my guitar all day. my voice hung in there. the good thing about being a little bit nervous is that it improves my singing. it really does. my range increases (i can sing higher) and i get this vibrato thing going. i was unusually anxious because i had to wait so long to play. if i could have gone on a lot sooner, i would have been less nervous. *shrugs* well maybe not. i don't know. i'm not sure what the determining factor w/ my nerves is. sometimes i'm nervous, other times i'm not. i guess i'm probably much less nervous than a lot of people, prolly cause i'm not afraid of getting laughed at. i guess i figure if it takes getting laughed at to brighten someone's day, then hey i can live w/ that. after all, when you get up in front of a crowd you oughta be entertaining, right?
i was really tired like 2 mins ago but now i'm waking up a bit. enh... better study for tmw morning... ack.. morning.. meaning i'll have to get up.. why did i have to go and think about that? ack.. enh... blah... erg.
i was really tired like 2 mins ago but now i'm waking up a bit. enh... better study for tmw morning... ack.. morning.. meaning i'll have to get up.. why did i have to go and think about that? ack.. enh... blah... erg.
Tuesday, January 14, 2003
Sunday, January 12, 2003
well, out of some odd desire to waste time, i just took at inkblot test at Emode.com. according to the test,
"Laura, your unconscious mind is driven most by Peace". here's what else they said about me:
"You are driven by a higher purpose than most people. You have a deeply-rooted desire to facilitate peacefulness in the world. Whether through subtle interactions with love ones, or through getting involved in social causes, it is important to you to influence the world.
You are driven by a desire to encourage others to think about the positive side of things instead of focusing on the negative. The reason your unconscious is consumed by this might stem from an innate fear of war and turmoil. Thus, to avoid that uncomfortable place for you, your unconscious seeks out the peace in your environment.
Usually, the thing that underlies this unconscious drive is a deep respect for humankind. You care about the future of the world, even beyond your own involvement in it. As a result, your personal integrity acts as a surrogate for your deeper drive toward peace and guides you in daily life towards decisions that are respectful toward yourself and others. "
naturally, there's much more to my psyche, but to find all that out i would have to pay the paltry sum of $14.95. ah, ya gotta love pop psychology.
"Laura, your unconscious mind is driven most by Peace". here's what else they said about me:
"You are driven by a higher purpose than most people. You have a deeply-rooted desire to facilitate peacefulness in the world. Whether through subtle interactions with love ones, or through getting involved in social causes, it is important to you to influence the world.
You are driven by a desire to encourage others to think about the positive side of things instead of focusing on the negative. The reason your unconscious is consumed by this might stem from an innate fear of war and turmoil. Thus, to avoid that uncomfortable place for you, your unconscious seeks out the peace in your environment.
Usually, the thing that underlies this unconscious drive is a deep respect for humankind. You care about the future of the world, even beyond your own involvement in it. As a result, your personal integrity acts as a surrogate for your deeper drive toward peace and guides you in daily life towards decisions that are respectful toward yourself and others. "
naturally, there's much more to my psyche, but to find all that out i would have to pay the paltry sum of $14.95. ah, ya gotta love pop psychology.
Friday, January 10, 2003
heh. i'm amused by the fact that some day, after i've moved out, someone will move into my house. and eventually this person will take a good look at the walls of the room that was once mine and discover, likely with a sense of amazement mingled with sheer horror, that every square inch of drywall in this entire room is covered with holes from nails and thumb tacks. heheheheheh
i have more stuff stuck to my walls than probably anybody else i know... to make matters worse, i routinely rearrange everything, which means that i have to move stuff, thereby creating (you guessed it) even MORE holes! on the bright side, sometimes when i move stuff i find an old hole or 2 that can be reused. but usually the new pictures don't line up right. even now, my walls are screwed up because my pictures are behind my new desk. i don't know if i'll move them or not; there really isn't any place left to move them. there isn't even much space left on the doors (and i have 4 of them).
i've been thinking about my walls lately, and the chaotic appearance of my room. i truly believe that some day, when i have my own place (who knows- it might not be that far into the future) it will be tastefully decorated. i can't honestly go so far as to say sparingly, but tastefully at least. i like simple, modern furnishings. it's just that i have to fit all this stuff into just one room. if i spread it out, even over just 2 rooms, it would look a lot less busy. well, ok, maybe like 3 or 4 rooms.
currently, my walls contain the following items: 2 MC Escher posters (another one is on my door), a poster of "The Accolade" by Edmund Blair Leighton (a pre-Rafaelite), "The Hallucinogenic Toreador" by Dali, a Star Wars poster (from my brother), a framed No Doubt poster autographed by Gwen (stolen from Pete), a small print of "The Lady of Shallott" by John William Waterhouse (another pre-Rafaelite), a small holographic card advertising a Pink Floyd tour, a small black and white painting of a woman's face (not too sure where that one came from), a blurry photo of 2 people and some trees (came from my Zero 7 album), 2 sets of photos (you know those things where they have the matting and you can put a bunch of pictures in), 2 matted Star Wars lithographs (one of them is numbered... they're supposed to be collectible or someting... i'm a dork... i have anohter but i just now took it down to make room), an "olde time" photo of my family (from AlaskaLand), a signed print of some dude that i think is supposed to be Zeus (i got it from some guy at a comic convention), a Rolling Stone cover picturing No Doubt, a dorky poster depicting the biosphere (i bought it from some fund raiser thing way back in high school to help save the rainforest or some jazz), a cardboard print of Dali's "Persistence of Memory", my Theocratic Ministry School schedule, an empty peg waiting for me to get a new calendar, the cover of a Yes boxed set (it's pretty nifty looking), and last but not least, hanging on a tack are several feet of film from a short i did last year. whew! and i didn't even get going on the stuff that's on my doors!
ok well enough. colette just got here so we're gonna go watch a Hitchcock or 2.
i have more stuff stuck to my walls than probably anybody else i know... to make matters worse, i routinely rearrange everything, which means that i have to move stuff, thereby creating (you guessed it) even MORE holes! on the bright side, sometimes when i move stuff i find an old hole or 2 that can be reused. but usually the new pictures don't line up right. even now, my walls are screwed up because my pictures are behind my new desk. i don't know if i'll move them or not; there really isn't any place left to move them. there isn't even much space left on the doors (and i have 4 of them).
i've been thinking about my walls lately, and the chaotic appearance of my room. i truly believe that some day, when i have my own place (who knows- it might not be that far into the future) it will be tastefully decorated. i can't honestly go so far as to say sparingly, but tastefully at least. i like simple, modern furnishings. it's just that i have to fit all this stuff into just one room. if i spread it out, even over just 2 rooms, it would look a lot less busy. well, ok, maybe like 3 or 4 rooms.
currently, my walls contain the following items: 2 MC Escher posters (another one is on my door), a poster of "The Accolade" by Edmund Blair Leighton (a pre-Rafaelite), "The Hallucinogenic Toreador" by Dali, a Star Wars poster (from my brother), a framed No Doubt poster autographed by Gwen (stolen from Pete), a small print of "The Lady of Shallott" by John William Waterhouse (another pre-Rafaelite), a small holographic card advertising a Pink Floyd tour, a small black and white painting of a woman's face (not too sure where that one came from), a blurry photo of 2 people and some trees (came from my Zero 7 album), 2 sets of photos (you know those things where they have the matting and you can put a bunch of pictures in), 2 matted Star Wars lithographs (one of them is numbered... they're supposed to be collectible or someting... i'm a dork... i have anohter but i just now took it down to make room), an "olde time" photo of my family (from AlaskaLand), a signed print of some dude that i think is supposed to be Zeus (i got it from some guy at a comic convention), a Rolling Stone cover picturing No Doubt, a dorky poster depicting the biosphere (i bought it from some fund raiser thing way back in high school to help save the rainforest or some jazz), a cardboard print of Dali's "Persistence of Memory", my Theocratic Ministry School schedule, an empty peg waiting for me to get a new calendar, the cover of a Yes boxed set (it's pretty nifty looking), and last but not least, hanging on a tack are several feet of film from a short i did last year. whew! and i didn't even get going on the stuff that's on my doors!
ok well enough. colette just got here so we're gonna go watch a Hitchcock or 2.
Thursday, January 09, 2003
ok, well i've been having some problems w/ this blogger thing, but apparently it's working again. i'm kind of chilling out at the moment. i found out today that there is at least ONE person actually READING this blog. can you believe it?!? (i can't). well at least now i know who not to diss directly (j/k- you know who you are)
i've actually been in a really good mood lately and what not. i don't feel too much like addressing the issue i was venting about last time. i have kind of decided to just let it lie, at least for the time being. in the past, this technique has been very ineffective, so i continue to use it. ah well, i can't help it; i'm just a non-confrontational type of person i guess.
the shower for my friend Lis is this saturday (um.. tomorrow, i guess... it's FRIDAY already! woo-hoo!) and i am not extremely well-prepared, to be honest. i'm in charge of games, which is ridiculous, since i abhor all shower games ever invented. usually i was always the one rebellious little girl who went outside and got my nice outfit all messed up. i don't think my mom was too crazy about it. i suggested several fun and creative games, including Twister, charades, and that one game where everybody writes one line to a poem and you pass it around but you only get to see 1 or 2 lines of what is already written so then you get some weird results. none of the other bridesmaids were too keen on that. so we settled on the game where everybody gets into teams and then you have to decorate somebody w/ paper and duct tape and junk to make her look like a bride. we bridesmaids are going to decorate the actual bride. does'nt it sound deadly exciting?
dont get me wrong- i'm happy she asked me to be in the wedding; i feel honored and what-not. i'm certainly glad to be in the bridal party. but man, this whole shower thing is pretty seriously lame. guys have it lucky. they don't have to do anything, just throw a bachelor party. how hard could that be? round up some booze and hang out at somebody's house. i think the bachelorette party is going to be at my house. hmm...
ok, well if i had anything to say, i obviously am not getting anywhere close to saying it. oh yeah! i WAS going somewhere w/ this aside about the wedding, etc. heh heh. tonite Lis asked me what i'm going to do about my hair. HA! as if i was already thinking about my HAIR! the wedding is not for another 2 months. i just found it amusing. naturally, i told her i'm dying it green (to bring out my eyes) . oh my. i really am not moving toward anything vaguely resembling a point tonite. maybe i shoudl write again when i'm more awake. lata.
i've actually been in a really good mood lately and what not. i don't feel too much like addressing the issue i was venting about last time. i have kind of decided to just let it lie, at least for the time being. in the past, this technique has been very ineffective, so i continue to use it. ah well, i can't help it; i'm just a non-confrontational type of person i guess.
the shower for my friend Lis is this saturday (um.. tomorrow, i guess... it's FRIDAY already! woo-hoo!) and i am not extremely well-prepared, to be honest. i'm in charge of games, which is ridiculous, since i abhor all shower games ever invented. usually i was always the one rebellious little girl who went outside and got my nice outfit all messed up. i don't think my mom was too crazy about it. i suggested several fun and creative games, including Twister, charades, and that one game where everybody writes one line to a poem and you pass it around but you only get to see 1 or 2 lines of what is already written so then you get some weird results. none of the other bridesmaids were too keen on that. so we settled on the game where everybody gets into teams and then you have to decorate somebody w/ paper and duct tape and junk to make her look like a bride. we bridesmaids are going to decorate the actual bride. does'nt it sound deadly exciting?
dont get me wrong- i'm happy she asked me to be in the wedding; i feel honored and what-not. i'm certainly glad to be in the bridal party. but man, this whole shower thing is pretty seriously lame. guys have it lucky. they don't have to do anything, just throw a bachelor party. how hard could that be? round up some booze and hang out at somebody's house. i think the bachelorette party is going to be at my house. hmm...
ok, well if i had anything to say, i obviously am not getting anywhere close to saying it. oh yeah! i WAS going somewhere w/ this aside about the wedding, etc. heh heh. tonite Lis asked me what i'm going to do about my hair. HA! as if i was already thinking about my HAIR! the wedding is not for another 2 months. i just found it amusing. naturally, i told her i'm dying it green (to bring out my eyes) . oh my. i really am not moving toward anything vaguely resembling a point tonite. maybe i shoudl write again when i'm more awake. lata.
NOTE: the actual date of the following post is 1:44 am, Dec 31 2002. (blogger wasn't working that day)
***
heh. i've been swearing to myself under my breath for the last several minutes. i'm kind of ashamed, but at the last time it's rather entertaining. i was totally having issues last monday. then JP got mad at me 'cause i took off for a ride. when i'm upset, i go for a drive because it clears my head. it makes me feel better, i think, because when i'm behind the wheel i'm in control. also, i have to think about driving, which prevents me from thinking about what's bothering me. i dont' think it's ever failed to make me feel better, at least for a time. i'm really glad he let it go and didn't bring it up later. after all, i SAID i was giong for a drive it's not like i just vanished w/out saying anythying. also, i was only gone for half an hour.
heh so tonite i've been all ticked off. it's moderately entertaining. well, i was ticked off when i read this email, then i sort of forgot about it for a while, then when i thought about it again i got all aggravated. so i figured writign about it would help, and it does help. it's helping me to see the humor in the situation. sometimes that's surprisingly difficult to do. when you feel strongly about somebody, it's hard to take it when that person constantly does stuff to make you crazy. anyways, it's a mess, but i don't feel like dealing w/ it. really, to be honest i feel like my hands are tied. i have to be sincere. i've tried to get through, but he won't talk to me. as long as he refuses to confront me face to face, there's nohting i can do. i've made persistent overtures and been consistently blown off. well, you can only keep it up for so long and you have to start feel like it's a waste of time.
i kind of like typing in here better than writing in my diary because it doesn't make my hand cramp up. and i can type much faster than i can write. but the downside is i can't write the details because who knows, somebody might actually be reading this. i highly doubt it, though. i could probably write whatever i want in here i don't think anybody's reading this. HEY, you! if anybody is reading this, email me at my school address (lmcwil@umich.edu) to tell me. because i'd kind of like to know.
well i'm sure anybody who's very close to my circle(s) of friends probably knows what this is about anyways, despite my lack of details. *sigh* i do feel better now that i've vented a bit. well needless to say email is the bane of my existence in some ways. i gotta figure out how to use filters in pine.
***
***
heh. i've been swearing to myself under my breath for the last several minutes. i'm kind of ashamed, but at the last time it's rather entertaining. i was totally having issues last monday. then JP got mad at me 'cause i took off for a ride. when i'm upset, i go for a drive because it clears my head. it makes me feel better, i think, because when i'm behind the wheel i'm in control. also, i have to think about driving, which prevents me from thinking about what's bothering me. i dont' think it's ever failed to make me feel better, at least for a time. i'm really glad he let it go and didn't bring it up later. after all, i SAID i was giong for a drive it's not like i just vanished w/out saying anythying. also, i was only gone for half an hour.
heh so tonite i've been all ticked off. it's moderately entertaining. well, i was ticked off when i read this email, then i sort of forgot about it for a while, then when i thought about it again i got all aggravated. so i figured writign about it would help, and it does help. it's helping me to see the humor in the situation. sometimes that's surprisingly difficult to do. when you feel strongly about somebody, it's hard to take it when that person constantly does stuff to make you crazy. anyways, it's a mess, but i don't feel like dealing w/ it. really, to be honest i feel like my hands are tied. i have to be sincere. i've tried to get through, but he won't talk to me. as long as he refuses to confront me face to face, there's nohting i can do. i've made persistent overtures and been consistently blown off. well, you can only keep it up for so long and you have to start feel like it's a waste of time.
i kind of like typing in here better than writing in my diary because it doesn't make my hand cramp up. and i can type much faster than i can write. but the downside is i can't write the details because who knows, somebody might actually be reading this. i highly doubt it, though. i could probably write whatever i want in here i don't think anybody's reading this. HEY, you! if anybody is reading this, email me at my school address (lmcwil@umich.edu) to tell me. because i'd kind of like to know.
well i'm sure anybody who's very close to my circle(s) of friends probably knows what this is about anyways, despite my lack of details. *sigh* i do feel better now that i've vented a bit. well needless to say email is the bane of my existence in some ways. i gotta figure out how to use filters in pine.
***
Friday, December 20, 2002
hello. well i was in a rather bad mood earlier, but i worked on a new song and it kind of made me feel better. i already had the chords for hte most part, but tonite i wrote some words to go w/ it. i am hoping my throat will clear up enough that i'll be able to record some demos of my songs.
anywyas, i guess i'll just mention the theme of the new song. basically, i've been thinking lately about stuff, and i have decided that if i really care about somebody, then there can't be any in-between. what i mean is, either you're my friend or my enemy. i'm sick to death of people who think they can pretend to be someone's friend but not actually BE a friend. tha'ts total bull. i do'nt buy into that program. i'd rather have an enemy than a friend who i can't count on. i can't pretend. it has to be all or nothing.
ok, i don't know if this entry will make sense to most people who read it. but, if anyone does read it, i am sure there's somebody out there who knows exactly what i'm talking about.
anywyas, i guess i'll just mention the theme of the new song. basically, i've been thinking lately about stuff, and i have decided that if i really care about somebody, then there can't be any in-between. what i mean is, either you're my friend or my enemy. i'm sick to death of people who think they can pretend to be someone's friend but not actually BE a friend. tha'ts total bull. i do'nt buy into that program. i'd rather have an enemy than a friend who i can't count on. i can't pretend. it has to be all or nothing.
ok, i don't know if this entry will make sense to most people who read it. but, if anyone does read it, i am sure there's somebody out there who knows exactly what i'm talking about.
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