Ok, so I've made the startling discovery that I am an abnormally good conductor of electricity. (Yes, i know- it's shocking!) (Sorry, couldn't help myself.)

I came to this conclusion after my new PowerBook G4 (it's so CUUUUTE!!!) shocked me last night. It was a new experience in that mostly I don't get shocked by direct current. So that was a little different. I was rather taken aback by it, and rather disappointed (tonight I'm calling up Apple tech support).

Anyways, so this episode got me thinking- I seem to be shocked by a ridiculous amount of things. Like this one time, I got a brilliant idea. I wanted to play my guitar down by the lake. (This is when I lived at home, with my parents. It was also in my pre-acoustic days.) So I dragged my amp down by the shore and plugged it into a loooooooooong extension cord. Since it was summertime, naturally I was barefoot. Apparently the ground was slightly moist. Suffice it to say, within the space of about ten minutes, I had managed to get shocked by 1. the amplifier, 2. my effects pedal, and 3. (the crowning moment) the guitar itself. I'm pretty sure my guitar has shocked me on at least one other occasion, too.

My old car, a '97 Geo Prizm, used to shock me every time I got out of it. On one occasion, it shocked me so hard, there was an arc of blue light about a centimeter across. My arm was sore for a good half hour after that. I'm pretty sure it's not normal to get shocked that badly.

I've been shocked by a lamp (that was... just stupid...), shocked by a dog's "Invisible Fence" collar (I had to test it out on myself before I would subject my dog to it), and zapped by touching various metal objects. I suppose it's only a matter of time before I'm struck by lightening.

Perhaps this is some kind of karma-like payback for all those times when I was little, on Tuesday nights after the book study, when I would shuffle around downstairs on the carpet in my socks. There was a nail that stuck out of the wooden paneling on the wall in one place, maybe a quarter of an inch. The goal was always to see who could generate the biggest spark.

I wonder if my bizarre ability to conduct current might be related by my ridiculous propensity to break things, usually simply by using them. It's amazing I can get my computer to work at all.