Death, which I seem to think about a lot but seldom blog about

The other day we were out in service and went on someone's return visit that has cancer. In fact, the friend who was visiting her was afraid she might have passed away, b/c last time she went to see her, she was in the hospital in critical condition. The lady has stage 4 cancer and she's got 2 kids.

I commented something like "Man, it must be hard to live with that hanging over your head." I paused, thinking about it a moment, then continued, "...But then, I guess we all are- living with that hanging over our heads." (thereby totally bringing down the entire service group.)

The fact is, we are all living under a death sentence. If it weren't for the ransom, none of us would have any real hope for an everlasting future. When you think about it, at what point can you ever say, "it's enough- I've had enough life, really I don't mind dying now." Is it worse to die now than next week? The fact is, if you're happy, and you aren't in constant pain, life is a blessing and a joy. I felt in light of tomorrow's Memorial of Jesus' death, it was an appropriate topic to ruminate about.

A separate thought about death that also came out of the same day in service. We were talking about cancer and someone made the remark that surviving has a lot to do with your will to live. I have to admit it kind of bothers me sometimes when people say that. I'm not saying it's completely untrue. For example, I know someone whose dad was living with a 3-month cancer death sentence for over a year, but he managed to live to see her wedding day, and then died just a few weeks later.

But my aunt wanted to live, too. She had grandbabies that she fully expected to see grow up. She had a marriage that was happier towards the end of her life than it had been during the 40 odd years prior (they married young- she wasn't that old). She was loved. She had a lot of things she enjoyed doing. She had a strong will to live, but it wasn't enough.

I don't plan on dying, but if I do I hope to at least die doing what I believe in, to the last.